TRANSCRIPT – The Burning Man Relationship Survival Guide | Philippe Lewis

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This interview was originally produced as a podcast episode. We strongly encourage you to listen to the audio, which includes emotion and emphasis that’s not on the page. Transcripts are generated using a combination of speech recognition software and human transcribers, and may contain errors. Please check the corresponding audio before quoting in print.

LL: Hello beautiful revolutionaries. This is Lorna Liana here for another episode of EntheoNation and I am back today with Philippe Lewis who is a dear friend. Philippe is a sex and intimacy teacher and coach based out of the San Francisco Bay area and he has been going to Burning Man since 1998.
So he has gathered some great relationship wisdom for us today as we ready ourselves for the burn. So if this is your first time going to Burning Man with a partner or even if it’s not, this episode is for you.
Thank you so much for joining us today Philippe.
PL: You’re welcome. It’s great to see you again.
LL: Totally, so I just want to have you introduce yourself to the audience as to who you are, what you do and what makes you a Burning Man expert.
PL: Oh my, Burning Man expert. I’m sure Burning Man will sue me for that one.
LL: Okay, that’s right. So don’t worry about it.
PL: No, no I am not worried about it. It’s just funny how Burning Man is just so particular about the way Burning Man is used but it’s okay. I mean essentially, I have been going to Burning Man since 1998, that’s a long time. It’s almost 20 years. Wow, 2018 is not that far. So I have a lot of experiences whether they were with my wife, my now wife and we’ve been going to Burning Man. We probably went to Burning Man seven or eight times together.
We went to all the possible crunchiness and difficulties that you can imagine although we never actually broke up on the playa. That will be a different one, but fortunately we’ve never reached that point but there’s been some really, really intense moments and then when not with her, I’ve been with different lovers because we’re open or even before her and even by myself and I’ve gone through and done big theme camps, I have done small intimate theme camps or just camping by myself or with a few friends.
So it’s just a wide range of expenses I’ve accumulated and essentially, I geek out on this kind of stuff. I love figuring out the way people interact and why they behave the way they do and then I just kind of extract little bits of clarity and wisdom out of that and then I just share it. So you could call me an expert or you could call me a geek, that’s my way of reclaiming the word geek. It’s just somebody that’s really, really into what they do or what they’re into and in my case, it’s relationships and intimacy.
LL: So how many times have you been to Burning Man?
PL: I think I am going on 11 times at this point.
LL: Wow, yeah.
PL: I have skipped a few times because I could, because I could travel and go. One year, it was agonizing but I would decide to go to India and Thailand and just on the night of the burn, we were flying out. Another time we went to Maui and we actually managed to watch the burn on our phone via, essentially it was the phone to the cell network via satellite to Burning Man watching the man burn, it was amazing and it was hilarious.
Like we were watching the man burning as we were camping on the edge of a beach of Maui. So there’s a lot of variety of experiences not going to Burning Man and experience what it feels like to not be the one, all of your friends are there and having an incredible time.
LL: I know. I am having that fear of missing out, that FOMO moment right now. I will still be in Barcelona doing the burn so yeah, all my friends are going and I’m like, “You know Spain is really awesome and I think I am just going to be here,” but man, it feels like I’ve got these pangs of FOMO.
PL: Wait, wait, Spain has its own regional burn, right? Nowhere I think it’s called?
LL: Yes, that already happened and I missed it unfortunately. I kind of just arrived around that time and just learned about it but yeah, next time which is good and hey, that’s really great to know about Spain also. So it’s a Burning Man friendly country, yay.
PL: Absolutely.
LL: So you have mentioned that you had some really intense moments on the playa and I’ve heard of many couples breaking up and many friendships ending on the playa. So I am kind of curious to know why does that happen?
PL: Well it’s pretty simple. The playa is a cauldron. It’s not just a cauldron; it’s a hot dry cauldron. You throw people in there and they go through all sorts of states simply because it’s an intense environment and so it’s dry, it’s hot, there’s a lot of people, it’s very noisy, of course they party their asses off, a lot of people do. I don’t know I would say most but a lot of people do so they are pushed by the elements.
They are pushed by lack of sleep, often lack of water, lack of food or their body feels different or they haven’t acclimated. So all of these reasons and of course, drugs, some people do drugs. I don’t know about you but that certainly happened to me a few times. Or whatever you call it of course, medicine, drugs and then ultimately, it just pushes you in so many different directions and so the result is, if you’re in a relationship and there’s anything shaky inside of it and the ways that you relate with your partner, that’s going to get magnified. So I often tell people the playa is a cauldron and playa magnifies everything.
LL: I would completely agree. The last time that I went to the playa was really challenging with my partner and I think it really did accelerate our breakup because we had some irreconcilable differences. But I am curious to know then, we went to the playa wanting to have the most amazing experience that we could have and obviously there were moments of that and then there were moments of challenge especially in the low serotonin moments.
So I am curious to know what is your best advice to people, whether friends or couples on how to optimize their enjoyment on the playa while minimizing potential conflicts?
PL: Wow, I would say there are a few things. We can go into details with some of them if you’d like, you just have to tell me. Having a vision for your time on the playa is very, very important. Of course, you could just show up and see what happens but that’s also leaving things up to chance. It would be like travelling to a new country and deciding you’re just going to see what happens and then often, what actually end up happening are the elements starts to impact you.
The lack of sleep and all of the things that I just mentioned earlier about that can impact your experience start to impact your experience and then you kind of lose track of the openness and the ease that can come with just allowing what happens because you were never thinking in the first place that you are going to be less able to allow for this kind of serendipity. So having a plan or vision of some sort is really helpful.
So by that I mean there’s different ways to make a plan. So I will just leave it at that and we can go deeper into that. There’s also making a bit of a bucket list or checklist. If there’s a way that you can come up, which often people do, make a list of the DJ’s you want to see, the classes you want to take so that on any given day if you’re like, “What are we doing today? What’s going to happen?” Then you have some ideas and that might spark some inspiration. That it will take you out into the possible funk that you might be it at any moment whether it’s because of the heat or because of food or because your body is still acclimating.
So having these things that are inspiring, you could get out of your camp and go out and explore. Sometimes it just happens, you see an art car driving by or you know there’s a DJ playing at 3 o’clock in the afternoon or in the middle of the night, then that just pulls you along in a way that is inspiring. So that’s what I’m talking about. Now, a few other things. You can also have intentional days. You can create days that are going to be about something in particular. I will name a few just to give you an example.
You can have what’s called The Wednesday, which is essentially a low prep, high serendipity day. You just basically go out with as little stuff as possible, just water maybe, you could go out naked with water and then just go and explore. So you’re not worried about all the gear, you’re not worried about what’s going to happen, what’s going to happen is essentially what’s going to happen and you don’t go into too many details about what that’s going to look like. So it’s just about being open. You can do a day trip; day tripping and most people forget that you can just do day tripping in terms of drugs. They often think that its only happening at night but daytime could be really awesome too. It’s a different experience. The same drugs will impact you in a totally different way.
Having an art day or an art night where all you’re doing is going from art to art to art. It’s kind of doing a tour of the art and it’s totally different during the day as it is in the night. A flirting day, you could just go around and either gives compliments to people, appreciation to people, giving things away to people. I call it flirting but it’s not actually sexual or sensual flirting. It could just be a way to interact with people. Having a split day, which means that you are going on your own for a whole day and your partner is going on their own for a whole day and you make a plan to come back to camp at a fixed specific time such us sunset or sunrise.
LL: That’s a really good one. It’s nice to be able to have your own independent experience of Burning Man, especially if you’re out on different rhythms, right? Like sometimes one person takes much longer to pull stuff together. I know I have this thing about sunsets. I love to take beautiful photos at sunset and sunrise and I don’t want to be waiting around for anything. I just want to be out there because sunsets are only for an hour and then it’s night. Then you miss out the opportunity and the sculptures are so incredible at sunset especially when they’re all lit up and everything is all pink and purple, yeah.
PL: Oh yeah.
LL: Great, great advice there.
PL: Yeah. So just to recap, make a checklist, create a vision. There’s a particular way that you can create a vision it’s called a CPR. You can Google it or I’ll put it on the notes for the show but basically what it is…
LL: What does that stand for?
PL: It stands for Context, Purpose, and Results. So it’s a particular structure where you state all the results that you want to see happen as if they happened in the past and then the purpose is kind of a statement that basically explains what those results actually mean. So it would sound like, “The purpose of my trip to Burning Man is to enjoy myself in the most amazing way so that my relationship with my sweetie is strengthened forever and ever,” that would be an example.
So, “The purpose of X is X so that X” and then essentially you just plug in the words and then see what comes out. The ideas you work as you’re writing the results and the purpose and also the context, which I’ll talk about in a second, is to create something that is inspiring for both people. Now, the results don’t need to happen for sure. They can just be something that might happen, that you would like to see happen. And when you speak about it, it’s inspiring. But it’s not a checklist that you need to have happen once you get there.
Then purpose also should be something that’s inspiring in terms of a sentence. It should be like, “Wow, I want that” and then your partner is like, “Yeah, I want that too,” and then the last piece is the context and the context is just one, two or three words that is the title of that whole experience you’re trying to create or that whole vision. So it could be “shining love”, it could be “amazing adventure”, it could be anything that both people are going to look at each other like, “Wow, I want to go on that trip with you, now that I know that we both agree and we both feel good about this experience together as we spelled it out.”
LL: You know, this is also really great advice for the grand playa. So whatever you do on the playa and in this whole framework that you’ve suggested, could you imagine if you took this into the world at large and how your experience would change with you and your beloved or you and your friends or just even you interacting in the world?
PL: Absolutely, it’s something that you could use anytime in your life and it just creates more consciousness around what happens. The more conscious you are about your experience, the more you’re going to get out of it. Most of the time, I can’t recall one time where this was not true and so, it’s just really about putting more attention on the experience rather than just letting it happen.
Sometimes when you let things happen, it turns out amazing. And to put a little bit of intention to it is not to say that serendipity gets taken out of the equation. It’s just to be a little bit more conscious and a little bit more focused on your experience, which give you so much more appreciation for it and when something random completely happens, you get to experience it more because basically instead of missing it because you have your attention on it.
LL: Okay, so then do you have any additional recommendations for couples? It can be pretty intense to be with each other in a harsh party environment, a 24/7 for three to seven hot dusty days. So imagine that and being in a tent and really hungover. So what other relationship maintenance tips do you have?
PL: Okay, well there are a couple of things I want to speak to. Having the basic handled is super important. So I would like to get into that just for a minute and then, I’ve got these rules that my wife and I and a couple of friends came up with called The Rules of Burning Man, which is sort of like, if you’ve ever seen Fight Club, then you know the rules of Fight Club and it’s the same idea.
Is that basically, we came up with these rules that at any moment, we can look at each other and say, “Rule number three,” or, “Rule number five,” instead of going into a big explanation about what’s going on and I can go into that as well. But first, I’d like to say the most important thing, the basics of being to Burning Man together with a partner is to have your heart, your mind and your body handled.
If you’ve got all three, then everything will go a lot more smoothly and a lot of people forget about the body part because they don’t realize especially if it’s their first time at Burning Man, they don’t realize that their body is going to be massively impacted and when your body is impacted, your heart is impacted and you can’t think straight. So I’ll just go into that really quickly. First, acclimation. It’s important to get your body ready for the playa.
It makes a big difference if you spend a lot of time in the sun ahead of your trip and get used to putting on sunscreen all over and expect that the playa will be hot, dusty and dry and it will take about two to three days for your body to adjust to that kind of heat, that kind of dryness and dustiness. Some people never get used to any of it and they feel miserable the whole time and that’s also a possibility.
So just keep in mind to take good care of your body and here are some of the ways that you can do that. Have the right food and eat well. That should be a given but when you’re in a hot, dry environment, often people are less hungry so they stop eating and so you want to get the most favorite foods on the playa and the ones that are easy to prepare that won’t go bad so that when you’re hungry, you’re just going to grab something and eat it.
And by it won’t go bad, I mean fruit. Fruit will go bad really fast, bread will go bad really fast, in fact, I will share a document that has my favorite tips that include some of these things. Water, always drink more water than you think is necessary. I think that’s pretty much a given but people who don’t go to the dessert don’t realize that even when they’re not thirsty, they should still drink water and then it’s good to have things like emergency in it. It will help with the electrolytes and it will help you retain more of the water instead of just peeing it right out.
Last piece, sleep. Sell not last piece. Actually there’s one more piece after that that we should go into. So have a sense of how much sleep you need ahead of time. If you’re the kind of person who needs at least seven hours of sleep or six or can go by with less, then you need to know how you need to recover if you can go by with less. If you can’t, then trying to force yourself to not sleep enough, it will probably result in you being a bad mood or not feeling good the next day on top of your body time to acclimate, it’s usually a disaster.
So get a really good sense of how your sleep patterns work and share that with your partner especially if it’s a new partner because you might have a different kind of sleep pattern, which means that one partner don’t want to be up. The other partner will want to sleep and that could cause conflicts. So if you know that ahead of time, you can prepare for it and when your partner wants to nap or sleep, then you know what to do. You can go out and explore, you can stay at camp and clean up, there’s different ways you can adjust this.
Also, how do you sleep in the heat? If you don’t do it well, most people don’t, then make sure you have the right kind of shade. So you could be outside of your tent in a shaded area and sleep on a cot or something like it and also bring earplugs because if you’re in a tent, it’s like there’s nothing. You’re only protected by the wind and the dust and a little bit by the sun but otherwise in terms of sound, you can hear everything so earplugs are very, very important. Last but not the least, drugs or medicine. It’s important to know the difference between the different drugs and different medicines and how your body and your mood is affected by them.
So the difference between psychedelics, entheogens or other kinds of drugs and how they affect you. So knowing that, you can have a conversation with your partner ahead of time about how you like to engage in recreational drugs and how that affects you. Some drugs call for a short commitment like 90 minutes like PHP. Some calls for hours like the MDMA or 2C-B and some call for a huge commitment like LSD, eight to 12 hours.
You have to be ready for that because if you know that your body will need to sleep in eight hours and then you come back to camp and you’re still tripping then you won’t sleep and then you’ll feel crappy the next day. So you have to gauge and prepare for the commitment that the drugs will involve so that when you need to sleep, you can sleep, when you’re out there and partying, you can go out there and party and coordinate how to calibrate that with your partner. It is very, very important.
LL: That is so important because I began to tell you that trying to go to sleep after 12 hours of being on the playa on LSD and by the time you get back, it’s at noon, right?
PL: Right.
LL: And if you’re in a tent, in a dusty tent on like day 3 oh my God, that sounds horrendous. You might want to find some nice furry pile, like a beanbag piles in a chill out zone somewhere and just make that your crash pad you know?
PL: Yes and so what I’m saying is prepare ahead of time, think ahead of time how the drugs will affect you for how long, what kind of food, what kind of sleep and what kind of water you’ll need so that if this is all ready to go then things overlap in a proper way. That includes your partner too and the last piece about drugs is, the recreational drugs is keep in mind the drugs can often lead you to a bad trip.
Because I have a deal with my partner that we will never do new drugs out in the playa because we felt at that time and I do well on new experiences but she rarely does. One maybe four times out of five it will be a bad experience for her. So now, we never try anything new. We go with the ones that we know, that we know are awesome, that we know feel good, that we know give us a good mood or fun experience for both of us reliably. If you are not sure if something is going to give you a reliable experience, better to just avoid it or if you do go for it, then realize that this might turn out into be a bad experience and be ready with that expectation.
Not that you are expected to be that way but you expect that if something goes bad, that you’ll know what to do such as, “We’ll just go back to camp,” or, “I’ll need to sleep,” and if you don’t want to sleep then you need to know what to do. Because in those moments of bad trips, you can’t think straight. So it’s better to think ahead and be ready for an experience that might happen rather than try to decide in the moment who stays up, who can go out, is this okay, is this not okay?
LL: Those are all really great tips, thank you. So how about the whole playa romance thing because you go there and there’s just so many opportunities, right? If you’re single or if you’re open, there are lots of people running around really sexy or naked and it just seems like having a playa romance are actually quite hard to avoid you know? I don’t know, what would you recommend in terms of how to handle them both on the playa and after Burning Man?
PL: The main thing, I mean with this particular podcast is about basically surviving and having your relationship survive Burning Man. So I am going to assume in this case that you’re with someone and then the romance would be with someone else, either you or your partner and how do you handle that and it could be anywhere from a nice flirtation with somebody at camp or having this sense of openness or the drugs are making you do it or just loosening you up in some ways that you normally wouldn’t.
Or maybe it’s because the playa is a space with infinite possibilities and you feel that and you feel that expansiveness and you want to be able to explore it so how do you handle this? If you’re not polyamorous or you’re not in an open relationship, this could be extremely difficult especially if there’s already some rift in your relationship. So I am not going to recommend going there specifically if your relationship is not ready for it.
This is the kind of conversation I have with my clients before Burning Man but having said that, if you feel like your relationship might be up for it, then you decide that between each other like, “What if? What if I want to kiss someone? What if I want to have sex with someone?” Then at some point, again to set the stage for this to go well.
So a lot of couples decide if they’re not out in the open, they decide on this thing called The Festival Rules. The Festival Rules is different rules apply for a relationship while we’re at a festival and outside of the festival, they don’t apply anymore. So that just creates, book ends the time where things can go a little bit crazy or live it more lose or live it more open in a way that feels safe for the couple.
LL: its kind of like, “What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas” type of thing.
PL: Exactly. Totally yes and we’ll get back to that in a second. So how do you handle if you have a playa romance and you want to continue after the playa, so that’s another thing. But if you do have a sense that you want the rules to be different, I created these cards called “the boundary card” which allow each person who is a couple to define what the rules they want for their partner. So what’s okay, what’s not okay? What kind of context would make something okay?
So they’re called the boundary cards and what couples usually find is that the rules for, for example, the rules that I have for you to go out and play and interact with people in a flirty sexy sensual way are going to be different than the rules that you have for me in the ways that you are okay with me going out and play and so, it’s a very critical and important conversation to have because often couples assume that because it’s okay for you, it’s okay for me and that’s not true.
LL: I want to totally highlight that. I love how you presented that and the cards are a fantastic way to do that because it’s absolutely true. What is okay for one person may not be okay for another person. So what I’ve seen in my own relationship history is sometimes, and I think a lot of people have this too, where there’s this judgment on whether or not you are okay with something just because the other person is.
Then there’s a lot of conflict, potential conflicts, so if you can just accept the fact that boundaries might be in different places and what’s going to bother you may not bother the different person or vice-versa then just clarify the frontiers of your relationship with what’s okay and what’s not okay clearly. That I think is the most compassionate way to communicate your needs.
PL: Yes and the cards help because you’re having an experience defining that boundary for your partner, you are having that experience with the cards. Your partner is not the one asking, “Well what if somebody wants to give me a blowjob?” Or, “What if somebody wants to kiss me?” Because hearing it from your partner can be super triggering but when you are considering it in a more neutral way because the card is saying, “Well what about this, what about that?” It’s actually not as trigger.
And so it allows for a little bit more clarity to emerge rather than trigger but I have to say, the first my wife did it because we had created this in a really difficult moment in our relationship, she had a really hard time. It wasn’t like a walk in the park. It was easier than me asking her but it was still hard. So the cards will definitely bring up some stuff but it will also eliminate a lot of the unknowns that often creep up.
Like you set a boundary, no kissing and then your partner comes back and they’re like, “Well you said no kissing but she gave me a blowjob. I hope that was okay?” However, it is a funny example because the reasons that most people are thinking, “Well yeah, a blowjob is way more intimate.” But that’s not necessarily true. For some people, kissing is more intimate than a blowjob.
LL: That’s really interesting.
PL: So it is not always true in the order of like the bases like first base, second base, third base, it’s not always true that if somebody were not okay with first base that it means that a lot of it would be okay with everything else. That’s where the cards come in. They eliminate these entire unknown and all of these loops, there’s a name for it.
LL: These are loops.
PL: No, no, it’s when people find the things that the rules they didn’t cover?
LL: Oh gaps, gaps?
PL: Yeah, the gaps in the rules or whatever you call that.
LL: Right, yeah.
PL: So having said that, essentially the conversation with the cards and the conversation with your partner is about figuring out what types of experiences are okay or not okay and is it going to be with others separately or together? There’s the playa romance and when I say “romance” I also mean it could be a sexual experience or sensual experience, how many experiences are okay? I’ve had my wife tell me, “You can have three experiences and these are the boundaries for the experiences,” and I did and it was awesome because I felt like I stayed within the bounds.
She still had a hard time but not because of the number of experiences with this, it’s because of the type of experiences but having said that, to be able to set boundaries just tonight versus not with our friends, all of these things kind of helped figure out what’s okay and what’s not okay and it’s important to know that even if somebody says, “I’m okay with this,” that the reality of it will be different, possibly different than the imagining of it.
So the forecasting just like the weather, forecasting is an imprecise art or science, depending on how you look at it and so it’s good to know. You can’t just say, “Well you said you are going to be okay with me kissing somebody else,” and then it turns out that you kiss the wrong person and they kissed the wrong person and they kissed at the wrong time. “I said I was okay, I know, but I still don’t feel okay,” and so these conversations happen.
You can’t blame people for having a real experience based on a real event that’s different than what they expressed would happen if they didn’t have what would happen hypothetically and then there’s also what sort of checking needs to happen when an experience does happen? What kind of check in with your partner? Like how do you come to your partner and say, “Hey, I just did this,” or, “I did this last night.” When is the check in supposed to happen? How does it look like?
Do you come to your partner and say, “Hey, I just had sex with someone,” and they’re like, “What? Where did that come from?” Because they’re not ready. Versus, “Hey, I had an experience with somebody last night and I like to share it with you. Let me know when you’re ready,” and then at least emotionally the person can just brace themselves not between two bites of their lunch and then they can say, “Okay, tell me what happened and tell me this level of details. I don’t want to know who it is.”
Or, “I do want to know who it is, or I want to know what base, is it first base, second base, third base.” So all these conversations are good to have and I just want to say, I’m giving you a few nuggets here but the reality of it is, this is a practice. So it’s a bit of a crapshoot when you do it and you have never done it before. It might turn out great or it might turn out awful because you don’t know the sensitivities of your partner in that particular regard.
Once you’ve practiced it many times and you know how you react to their sensitivity because it’s not just about them after you have an experience with someone, it’s about them having an experience and then what’s your response about what you shared and then how this spirals either into goodness or into the pits of hell.
LL: The pits of hell, oh my goodness. All right, so I just want to let you know that we’re coming into the end of our interview time here. So let’s take this back to the pits of hell. I want to ask you my favorite question which is, Philippe, what was the most visionary experience you’ve had at Burning Man?
PL: Oh wow, you told me earlier that you were going to ask me that and I was like, “Wow this is a long story.” So I am going to try to keep it short. 1999 I joined a particular camp called The Burning Man Opera. Most people haven’t heard of it unless they have been going to Burning Man for many years. This was something I witnessed the year before in ’98 and I was immediately smitten.
I fell in love with the whole idea, which was to essentially create a story, a ritual performance where people would go deep into their character and essentially embody their character and become their character for a week and engage with the other participants of the camp and figure out their costumes, their choreography as they figure out the story as it was created and unfolding on the playa and even before the playa.
So for our year, the year that I participated, it was based on Haitian Voodoo and it was one of the most deepest transformative experience I’ve ever had. It was a primary religious experience as some people call it. I literally became this general as I interacted with people even my girlfriend was like, “Who are you and what did you do with my boyfriend?” And it felt as it happens in Haitian Voodoo, I felt literary guided by a spirit, by the spirit of this general.
And it gave me great power and a great sense of myself and then after the performance, after we finished the performance, I felt that spirit leave and I spent years after that re-finding, finding that power again for myself because that spirit wasn’t there to support me. So it was just a deep, intense experience and also an experience of loss and grief after the performance and after it felt like the performance was over. So maybe that’s what we call visionary, I don’t know but it was amazing.
LL: That sounds to me like a very, very much medium shift work. There’s a lot of spiritual communities in Brazil that still do that kind of work but in a much more traditionally ceremonial container but at the same time, Burning Man is one big ritual. So it wouldn’t at all surprise me that you would have a real experience of spirit incorporation and how would that actually affect you, so.
PL: Oh yeah, it was great. Oh and we’re not going to have the time to talk about it but over time, I came up with these things I call “The 10 Rules of Burning Man” and I did mention it a little bit earlier so I’ll make sure that it’s on the website so you can look them up. They’re very useful to have, I could just say them right now or I can just put them on the website. It’s really useful.
LL: Yeah, why don’t you say the 10 rules and then also let people know how to best stay in touch with you and then I’ll make sure that the link to the 10 rules is in the show notes.
PL: Yeah and I will also include the link to the tips because those are going to be useful. So here are the rules:
Rule #1: You have to pee once in a while. This is very practical.
Rule #2: Don’t step in it.
Rule #3: The most important rule, it’s not about you.
Rule #4: Unless it is about you.
Rule #5: When the ship sets sail, it sets sail. This is for all the camps who are trying to leave their camp, all the people who are trying to leave camp, everybody is going back.
Rule #6: No more FOMO. I was just thinking about you earlier, “no more FOMO”. So be in a moment essentially, but it’s no more FOMO, it sounds much better.
Rule #7&8: Intentionally left blank because you will have to add your own rules, the things that work best for you, the things that you just need to remember at all times because this will give you a much better experience.
Rule#9: Everyone should have their orgasm. Everybody feels better when that happens.
Rule #10: The most important, it’s time to go and that’s when you’re at camp and the music is not that great and nobody can turn around to each other and say, “Rule number 10, let’s go.”
There you go.
LL: I love it. Thank you so much. So now, it’s time to go and how should people best stay in touch with you?
PL: That’s right, you can find me on If you need some more prep for your Burning Man experience, contact me. I do Skype, I do phone and I will also meet you in the Bay Area. Otherwise, you’ll see my list of tips and there will be all my contact information on the website so we’re good to go.
LL: All right, thank you so much. That was really enjoyable and yeah, I hope to run into you again on the playa. Whenever I see you, I’m always happy.
PL: Oh yeah, totally. We’ve known each other for a long time and I really, really value our friendship. Thank you Lorna.
LL: Yeah, totally man. Okay have a good one. Buy-bye, thank you.
PL: Bye.